1 post tagged “relationship”
Kim Komando is a wonderful source of information and entertainment. She refers to herself as the digital goddess, which I find kind of offensive. Be that as it may, I really enjoy listening to her because of the absolute flood of information she brings to her radio program. When I looked her up on the web I was blown away to see this very attractive lady who could have easily been a model but prefers to make her way in service to the rest of us as an information guru. Today, in a newsletter I have long since signed up for, she sent out a video link for her regular video of the day. This time she included two that have to do with the beauty industry. The image they started out with was a very attractive young lady but pasty and.... well, normal looking. You have to view them for yourselves, but suffice it to say that the image they wound up with could in no way be considered the same person. The commercials literally present an unrealistic standard of beauty.
The same surrealism is created in the porn industry and it isn't the look they're messing with. No, these people are targeting sexual behavior and their is no, none, '0' reality involved with their presentation of the 'ideal' woman. The result is that both women and men have unreal expectations of what a woman is in today's society. As the second video presents the devastating market to young girls, pressuring them to measure up to an unrealistic standard, so the pop culture is selling the pornification of our society so that men expect these unrealistic behaviors from women. It creates an environment where women are pressured further to change themselves to fit into a character model that is both self destructive and unfulfillable. The great search for happiness is forever elusive because the expectations drilled into us through these ads can never be met.
Put that together with the youth's interminable search for excitement and fun over values and investment and what you have is multiple generations of folks terminally unhappy, some so depressed and empty as to be suicidal and affected by other forms of mental disorders. This explains part of the great cultural divide between liberalism and conservatism, between self centered self service and stable kids who've had the influence of church and missions where they've learned to give of themselves, to invest in the value of others. Those who are happier are those who recognize that the great value of life is not found in fun and excitement but in lifelong friendships and close relationships with family, friends, and neighbors. To have others value you, your loving efforts, your sacrifices, your time investment in their lives, is to know a worth well beyond that of the next boyfriend or girlfriend, or the next bragging point or even widespread fame
The great voice in my life that confirms for me that joy and fun are very different emotions is the great man of clarity, Dennis Prager. He explains in his book, 'Happiness is a Serious Problem' that joy is that which I know as having an affirmation of my worth. Fun is a temporary engagement in some activity I enjoy. Joy stays after I've acted in what makes me joyful whereas fun is gone as soon as the activity is finished. An example of joy is watching a movie with my wife even when the movie is something I didn't particularly enjoy. It was the time I spent with my spouse that made the time a joy. Fun is a drive around the go-cart track in the miniaturized Indy car. It was a blast while it lasted but now that's over, what else can I do for fun.
I recently posted an article called 'Round My 'Hood' and in it I describe talking to some old gentlemen. I get a great deal of joy from having those discussions. I feel valued for the fact that I will stop my day long enough to hear a little story from somebody who has a life full of them. I also get joy from the articles I write on this blog. They are something I hope will be more timeless than not, so that when somebody reads them years from now, they will be as relevant as the day I wrote them. Well aside from the political ones. What I do for fun is very often to read books. Not self improvement or educational books, but the science fiction books or watch science fiction movies. Once the book is finished or the movie has ended, I have no value of the time spent in those endeavors.
I guess my point in this article is that we should not buy the pop culture image we're being sold. Put it back on the shelf and walk out of that store. We are better than that, we are more than that image. We have to have character and depth for our relationships. That beauty they're trying to sell us is temporary at best. The beauty you want to seek is that beauty that you find in grandma and grandpa. What makes a grandparent attractive to a kid? Is it cookies when you visit? Is it the ride on Grandpa's ol' Poppin' Johnny? Or is it just the fact that they spend time with you, and are really interested in your life?
Beauty is not skin deep, in runs to the core of character, and anybody who can't or won't see it is not worth maintaining a relationship with. Beauty is more likely to be found in your level of joy instead of the thickness of your makeup, perfume, and the price of your dress. Its time to hold our standards up a little higher for the sake of our girls, for the value of our women. I'm Judge Bob, I say we should judge right.
